Archive for the ‘Video Games’ Category

Dark Souls Wants To Eat Your Children.

February 5, 2011

That’s right mother fucker! Demon’s Souls “sequel” is coming for that ass and it’s coming to use your spine as dental floss. The spiritual sequel is called Dark Souls and this time, From Software is bringing it to the PS3 as well as the 360. So now even more people can experience the video game that’s the closest thing to self mutilation I can think of. All of you so called “hardcore” gamers who play nothing but Call of Duty, GTA and Madden need to understand what the word “hardcore” truly means . Dark Souls wants nothing more than to harm you and everyone you hold dear. It wants to batter you physically and rape you mentally.

The 60+ hours I spent on Demon’s Souls was a lesson in Stockholm Syndrome. My constant deaths were all my fault. After all, the game was just being itself. The game did no wrong. It was just being the abusive step-child smacking, wife beater wearing game it is. When I died it was all my fault. Yes, all…my…fault. *nervously looks around*


*cowers into fetal position*

Dark Souls


PSP2: Electric Bugal…okay, okay I won’t say it.

January 28, 2011

If you give me a new Hot Shots Golf and Monster Hunter 4 Portable with online co-op(not just local co-op) on release day I will go line up right now. RIGHT…NOW.

Random Nerdery.

January 14, 2011

Sometime last week while I was bed ridden and sick to my stomach, I found myself on an extremely high level of nerdiness. I found myself playing Earthbound on my Macbook Air using a PS3 controller. If you’re keeping score, that’s a Nintendo game on an Apple laptop using a Sony controller. What’s even geekier is that I had the presence of mind to realize that at that very moment, I was the antithesis of Microsoft. The only thing that was left is if the foot massager I was using ran some obscure version of Linux.

Honestly don’t give a crap about that sort of thing. I don’t care if people use Macs or PC’s or play games on their 360 or PS3’s or Wii’s, I just don’t give two shits. But a snap shot picture of me in my room that day, all evidence pointed to me as a Microsoft hater which I am not. Seriously though, I don’t care what kind of operating system someones toaster oven uses and if I heard two people arguing about why brand x is better than brand y I know I would come close to stabbing both idiots in the throat to prevent their fanboy genes from spreading to infect future generations. I’m completely indifferent to Microsoft.

The only thing about them that I hate is Steve Ballmer. Man, what an asshole douche.

What’s the point of this post? I have no idea.

Scratching Is The Future!

July 10, 2010

Cleaning out my old room at my parents house I came across some interesting things from my past. I thought I’d post them up for archival purposes.

About 12 years back I was a scratch djing fanatic. “Making sounds with turntables is the future, man! Mark my words, this is the start of something new! You’ll see! You’ll all see!” I would say. Well, it turned out “scratch music” wasn’t the next big thing but at the time you couldn’t tell me otherwise. During my skratch music period, the Invisibl Skratch Piklz were the objects of that obsession. I collected anything with their name attached to it: Mixtapes, scratch practice tapes, Dirtstyle break records, episodes of Turntable TV on VHS, battle videos, you name it. I bought everything. Well, everything except a $400 ticket to Skratchcon. C’mon, I wasn’t THAT stupid.

Anyways, here are a few things I’ve accumulated:

Here’s an old issue of URB from 1998 when ISP adorned their cover. I’ve tried to look for a picture of this online and to no avail. I decided to upload mine for posterity’s sake. So if you start seeing this image online, chances are it’ll be my scan. Look at the top right hand corner with the crease. That’s my crease!

Here’s a small feature in XXL magazine. I don’t have the magazine anymore as I simply cut the page out and threw the mag away. In hindsight, I shouldn’t have done that.

How obscure is this? This is a little 20 page EA supplemental that came polybagged with an issue of Electronic Gaming Monthly I bought way back in 98′. Basically it’s a mini sports magazine that has interviews, features and previews of EA’s entire 99′ sports line of games. Tucked in the very end of this mini mag, there lies a tips & tricks page where it tells you secrets you can unlock in your favorite EA sports game. One of these includes a secret for the game March Madness 99′, in which you can unlock a 3 minute video of Q, Mike and Shortkut by inputting the password: “ISP” or “Qbert”, then winning in Arcade mode. I haven’t seen it yet but I will soon, since I just bought March Madness 99 on Amazon for $5.

Hey, remember when the Wavetwisters DVD came out and you could buy a WT DVD cover signed by Qbert himself? All it cost was $10. Yeah, I bought one. Why? I have no fucking idea. The one kind of cool thing about the one he signed for me was he messed up signing his name and acknowleges it by writing “Oops, haha.” on it.

I remember…

July 1, 2010

Rant start.

I remember a time when shooters were games like Gradius and R-Type.
I remember a time when there were no bald, burly space marines.
I remember not giving a shit about 3D in games. Oh wait, I still don’t give a shit about 3D in games.
I remember (and loved) when GTA was in 2D.
I remember a time when the east ruled.
I remember when JRPG’s were referred to as just RPG’s.
I remember when Final Fantasy games had towns in them.
I remember when the people who imported their games at a premium price and learned another language to read the dialogue text on the screen in an RPG were known as “hardcore gamers”, and not people who simply play Madden and FPS.
I remember a time before DJ Hero when there was just Beat Mania.
I remember a time before Rock Band/Guitar Hero when there was just Un Jammer Lammy.
I remember a time before Def Jam Rapstar when there was just PaRappa The Rapper.
I remember as a kid I thought it would be cool to control games with nothing but my body.
I remember being an idiot when I was a kid.
I remember when games came out faster due to developers not being forced to add online multiplayer to a game that has no reason to have it in the first place.
I remember when you challenged someone to a game, you stood right next to them so that when you called someone a “faggot”, you could and would get smacked in the face.
I remember when certain Snes cartridges cost $60-$80 when they came out.($60 games aren’t a new thing, “stop bitching” is what I’m saying.)
I remember when video game magazines mattered.
I remember when magazines mattered.
I remember when we played games with a controller.
I remember when I wasn’t a bitter old man.

Can it be that it was all so simple then?

Rant over.

Gamefan+EGM: Don’t Call It A Comeback

May 8, 2010

I never thought I’d see the day these two magazines would be back on the shelves. Coincdentally making their return at the same time. *sniff* Brings a tear to my eye. Long live print!


Warning! A Huge Podcast Is Approaching Fast

May 2, 2010

I am a big podcast nerd. I subscribe to 20+ podcasts and listen to them throughout the week. A majority of them are video game related podcasts which is ironic since I don’t play as many video games as I once use to. Oddly enough I still manage to follow everything going on in the scene. The one thing that I find sorely missing is in-depth coverage of Japanese imports. With the attention shifting more and more to western developed games, it feels like Japanese centric games are taking a back seat and the lack of coverage on them is proof of this.

Thankfully, former editors of the now defunct Play magazine Nick Des Barres aka “Nick Rox”, Casey Loe and Eric Patterson aka “Shidoshi” have a podcast that is strictly about import Japanese gaming entitled “Warning! A huge Podcast Is Approaching Fast” What’s great is that their prologue episode(#0) they talk about their history in the industry working for both Gamefan and Play magazines. Their little spat with EGM and Nick Rox goes into his frame counting prowess and how he got the legendary nickname “Blue Shadows”. In their official first episode they get into a more traditional routine and delve into 2 hours of straight import game talk. If you have any interest in the fading Japanese gaming scene, this podcast is for you.

Also keep an eye out for 8-4‘s podcast helmed by former EGM editors Mark Macdonald and John Riccardi which will also cover primarily Japanese games. Until then.

Project Trico

May 21, 2009

Team Ico is one of the main reasons why I play video games. Fumito Ueda is apart of my holy trinity of game designers. Shigeru Miyamoto, Hideo Kojima and Fumito Ueda are designers whose games I hold up on a pedestal. As long as these three continue to make video games, I will continue to play them.

On my list of favorite games of all time, Shadow of the Colossus and Ico are my number one and two. To say I’ve been eagerly awaiting a follow up from this team is an understatement. I’ve been anticipating this since I slayed the last colossus in SotC. I’ve kept tabs and written a post(once here and again here) anytime new information would leak out concerning the next Ueda/Kaido opus. To finally see something visually to go along with all I’ve heard about this game makes me incredibly happy.


Project Trico

Project Trico(tentative title) looks to have all of the trappings of a Team Ico game. An expansive, far reaching environment, a large puzzle filled labyrinth, an overall sense of isolation, the familiar level and character design. It’s all here. Just like past games, the reliance of another character plays heavy into the gameplay. Even though you relied on Agro while fighting many of the Colossi, he still felt like a secondary character. This new animal, a sort of dog faced griffin with underdeveloped wings, seems to be designed with more personality. Even more cutesy for the reason to what I’m guessing is to make the player grow more attached to it as it helps you along your journey. I have yet to play this game but watching the trailer of the animal carrying the child on his head with it’s body riddled with several arrows struck a chord with me. And if it can evoke this kind of reaction all before even playing the game, I can’t imagine how I’ll feel when I actually do.

That’s what makes Team Ico so brilliant as a development team. They convey emotion all with minimalism. Sure you can tell a heart breaking story in Final Fantasy when all you have is hours and hours of dialogue, but when you can do it with next to no talking, it’s a much more impressive feat. This game is the reason I bought a PS3 and I’m sure will be mentioned along with Ico and SotC as another strong example as games as art.


January 22, 2009

First episode of CO-OP is here! The former crew behind The 1UP Show are back and in this inaugural episode former 1UP/EGM staff talk Game of the Year 2008. Between CO-OP, Rebel FM and The Geekbox, it almost feels like old times. Now I just need Garnett, Shane and John Davidson to reunite and record a podcast on a weekly basis and then and only then will my need be completely satiated.

1UP/EGM Forever

January 18, 2009

This…is…rad. I grabbed this from Dan “Shoe” Hsu and Crispin Boyer’s site Sore Thumbs. This piece was done by artist Bill Mudron, who drew EGM’s Seek And Destroy series, as a goodbye and tribute. It supposedly contains every 1Up staff and tons of EGM inside jokes throughout it’s run.

Click to enlarge.


Okay here’s who I got so far. I probably got a few of these wrong. If any 1UP/EGM super fans can help fill in the blanks, please comment and do so.

Top Center Cirlce: Dan “Shoe” Hsu, Mielke, Shawn Smith, Mark Mcdonald, Donahoe?, Quarterman, Sushi X.

Right Side Top Circle: Jeremy Parish, Scott Sharkey, Ray Barnholt?, Jenn Frank, Alice Liang, other two I don’t know.

Right Side Bottom Circle: The 1UP Show Crew, Ryan O’Donnell, Matt Chandronait, Jane Pinkard, Kathleen Sanders, David Ellis, Rob Bowen, is that Che Chou? And I don’t know who’s at the very bottom.

Left Side Top Circle: Nick Suttner, Phil Koller, Anthony Gallegos, Crispin Boyer, Greg Ford, Jenn Tsao?, Tina Sanchez.

Left Side Botom Circle: Jeff Green, Ryan Scott, Shawn Elliot. Other two I don’t know.

Bottom Circle: Skip Pfister, Todd Zuniga, Shane Bettenhausen, Luke Smith, Garnett Lee. Two guys on the right, I’m not sure.

Outskirts: Sean Baby, Andrew Fitch, Demian Linn.